SECURE LOVE INCUBATOR
A 4-Step Process to Finding an Emotionally Available Partner
Get clear on what you really need and want from a partner, become an empowered, confident dater, and learn how to know when someone is emotionally available and ready for the real deal.
THE SECURE LOVE INCUBATOR:
A 4-Step Process to go from feeling confused and discouraged dating emotionally unavailable people to feeling fully empowered and confident that an emotionally available partner is ready and wanting to love you (like you deserve!) in just 4 short weeks.
If you’ve dated a lot of emotionally stunted or unavailable partners who ghost you, lead you on, or are hot and cold about whether they want to fully commit, you’ve probably heard a whole bunch of dating rules and advice about what you need to do (or not do) to find an emotionally available partner who is ready and wanting to commit.
But here’s what you might not know:
Dating rules, advice from people who are happily partnered, and overly romanticized concepts about what love is supposed to look like don’t work because they don’t take into account your unique relationship needs dictated by your personal Attachment Style, which is your emotional map for understanding how you feel and show up in your most intimate relationships.
The Secure Love Incubator will help you do 4 things:
Get clear on what you truly need and want from a life partner.
Feel more confident, empowered, and secure
going on dates and using the apps.
Ask for what you need and know when to move on
if you’re not getting it.
Learn how to tell when someone is trustworthy, emotionally available, and ready for a committed relationship.
The truth is, most people who are looking for love by trying to follow “the rules,” listen to advice from others, or let romance or “chemistry” determine who they date don’t find quality, emotionally available partners who are ready and wanting to commit.
Why?
Because healthy human connection is based on our ability to get our needs met within a given relationship. Dating rules, other people’s advice, and “chemistry” don’t take in to account your unique Attachment Style, which helps you understand what you truly need to feel safe + loved in an intimate, romantic partnership.
Without this understanding, we approach love from a reactive, subconscious state, attracting people who help us play out sometimes toxic ancestral patterns we’ve grown accustomed to from childhood. These patterns keep us from getting our needs met – which is necessary for feeling happy and loved – and without which a relationship cannot sustain itself healthfully in the long term.
4 REASONS MOST PEOPLE WHO ARE LOOKING FOR LOVE FAIL TO FIND EMOTIONALLY AVAILABLE, COMMITTED PARTNERS:
MISTAKE 1
We let instant chemistry and physical attraction determine if we want to date someone.
Studies have shown that terms like “chemistry,” “connection,” and “passion” are among the top reasons people say they fall in love. But being “in love,” isn’t the same thing as feeling “loved.”
When we feel loved, it’s because we’re getting all our needs met, meaning we feel safe + secure. We can definitely be in love with someone without feeling safe + secure, but this kind of relationship isn’t sustainable for the long haul. For deep, lasting partnership, you want BOTH — someone you feel connected to who will also want to make sure you feel loved and cared for, first and foremost.
MISTAKE 2
We assume people who are partnered know something we don’t, so we listen to their advice, assuming that if it worked for them, it will also work for us.
While your friends + family may know what to do when it comes to their relationship, it doesn’t mean they know what to do when it comes to yours. You are a unique butterfly with your own set of experiences, desires, and — most importantly — needs, and honoring them will lead you more quickly to finding a partner who can meet them.
MISTAKE 3
We are led to believe mythical dating rules about how to act in romantic situations that disconnect us from our authentic selves and put the other person’s needs before our own.
The secret truth about dating rules is that they actually attract unavailable people. They keep us in the space of being inauthentic and worrying about what the other person needs while abandoning or hiding our own needs for the sake of keeping them interested. The problem with this is that true intimacy only exists when we’re being authentic.
When you come from an aware and empowered place, you’re more able to trust what you authentically need and ask for it, without worrying about if you’re doing the “right” thing to keep them around. You’ll know that the person who is capable of being your partner will be happy and willing to give you what you need, even when you’re being your messy, authentic, always-growing self!
MISTAKE 4
We romanticize romantic love and don’t want to settle for anything less than the picture-perfect dream we hold of it in our minds.
Let’s be honest: most of us have our dream person living somewhere deep in the crevices of our mind, and we compare everyone we date against them, saying that we don’t want “settle” for anything less. But when we let ourselves be led by this unrealistic, romanticized idea of what we want our partner to be like, we end up settling for much bigger things like being treated well, or being made to feel like we’re a priority.
A huge component of finding an emotionally available partner is reconsidering your priorities around what you’re looking for in someone so that you never have to settle for your what you’re worth again.
This is why it’s my goal in life to help people get clear about what healthy, secure love looks + feels like with an emotionally available partner who is ready and wanting a committed relationship.
THE SECURE LOVE INCUBATOR:
A 4-Step Process to go from feeling confused and discouraged dating emotionally unavailable people to feeling fully empowered and confident that an emotionally available partner is ready and wanting to love you (like you deserve!) in just 4 short weeks.
I’ve taken everything I know about Attachment Theory and paired it with my 20 years of dating experience to build the best course + group coaching program to help people who are looking for love go from feeling confused and discouraged dating emotionally unavailable partners to feeling empowered + confident that an emotionally available partner is ready and wanting to commit to you.
By taking the Secure Love Incubator you will…
FEEL MORE CONFIDENT IN DATING
You’ll stop feeling like you don’t know what the eff you’re doing when it comes to love, and start to feel more secure, empowered and confident knowing exactly what YOU uniquely need to feel happy and secure in a romantic partnership.
MORE QUICKLY DETERMINE IF SOMEONE IS EMOTIONALLY AVAILABLE
You’ll get super clear on what matters most when determining if someone will make a good life partner (aka, if they’re emotionally available), rather than letting confusing feelings like chemistry and physical attraction alone make this decision for you.
LEARN HOW TO ASK FOR WHAT YOU NEED
You’ll learn communication tips that actually work so that you stop feeling like you have to swallow your needs for the sake of keeping your partner interested, and start to experience what it’s like to ask for what you need and have someone want + respect you more for it! This way of communicating also makes sure you waste less time on the wrong people and more quickly move on when they’re not meeting your needs.
EXPERIENCE A NEW SENSE OF SECURITY
Like the Rolling Stones said, “you can’t always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you just might find, you get what you need.” By letting go of the romanticized version in your head of the kind of person you think you want, you’ll open yourself up to possibilities you couldn’t have imagined! Love comes in unexpected packages, and the sooner you can embrace this idea the sooner you’ll start to experience what truer love and magic really feel like.
BREAKDOWN OF CONTENT
MODULE 1
Illuminate Your Shadows
We go deep quick by jumping right into the unknown: your shadows, aka, the parts of yourself you subconsciously keep hidden from yourself (and others) because they bring up uncomfortable feelings like shame, guilt, fear, or rejection. Many of these shadows are attachment needs of yours that have been going unmet since childhood, and are the reason for your tendency toward your unique attachment style.
At first, these shadows can be difficult to look at, but by learning to understand and have compassion for these parts of yourself, you’ll begin to plant the seed of belief that another person could also love these raw, vulnerable parts of you, too. This is the first and most necessary step towards creating secure love.
MODULE 2
Become the Scientist
In this second module, you’ll learn how to integrate your attachment style into your dating life so that you can start dating from a more secure space. You’ll hop on the dating apps (or learn how to if you’re not ready!) and master how to use your newfound knowledge of your unique style to detach yourself from outcomes and expectations (like a scientist) while swiping, messaging, and talking to people so that you can learn to make more accurate hypotheses about who is more emotionally available and wanting a committed relationship.
MODULE 3
Speak Your Truth
By far the greatest tool at your disposal as the Scientist is your voice. Your voice is how you'll perform "experiments," and collect your data about who you’re dating. Through this process you'll learn to decide if they could make a secure partner for you, and increase your inherent sense of self confidence + worth in the process.
We’ll cover things like what makes “effective” vs “ineffective” communication, strategies + tips for having uncomfortable conversations, and share some scripts to help you figure out exactly what you want to say when words are escaping you.
MODULE 4
Embody the Mountain
Mountains represent strength and power. They are solid, proud, and don't need to prove themselves to anyone or anything. When you embody the mountain, you learn to gain your power from your highest, most authentic self.
Perched atop your own, personal peak, you'll learn to stand your in truth, own your feelings, and validate your own needs. In so doing, you'll start to truly believe on a subconscious level, (which is key for manifestation) that someone is out there, just waiting to love you exactly as you are.
This module is a culmination of the three previous modules, combining your shadows, your dating story, and your voice to start developing a more solid sense of deep trust, love, and compassion for yourself so that you can integrate your attachment style and start living and dating from a more secure place. By doing so, you’ll start to learn to make dating decisions that serve your highest self, and nothing less.
STRESS-FREE MONEY BACK GUARANTEE
I want to make sure you get exactly what you hoped for out of this course, so if you realize in the first two days it’s not what you were hoping for, I’ll gladly give you your money back in full!
HERE’S WHAT YOU GET WHEN YOU JOIN:
Hands-on experience using the dating apps with a more secure mindset so that you can learn what it feels like to attract more available partners in real time.
4 online modules (dropping weekly) with comprehensive lessons taking you through the process of learning to date securely and attract more emotionally available partners.
Weekly exercises and guided journaling to help you integrate the material into your life and dating as you learn it.
4 group coaching calls via Zoom (held on Saturdays) with Taryn and the other members in your month’s incubator. These calls are optional but encouraged as they greatly increase your ability to understand, apply, and integrate the material, and therefore yield more effective results.
Online access to your incubator group on Mighty Networks, where you can post comments and questions about the course content or share any dating updates and receive support from those in your group.
Free access to the Truer Love Community Cohort, our membership made up of current and past clients who have been doing this work for some time and can provide great insight into the journey of learning to become a more secure dater.
1 (optional) group coaching call with the Truer Love Community Cohort.
Free access to all current and past specialty relationship + personal growth workshops taught by or with Truer Love. Some topics include astrology for attachment, coping with triggers, date night makeup, inner child meditation, self-care rituals, and more.
A 1-hour, complimentary 1:1 love guidance session with Taryn
(if registered by Friday, December 17th).
YOU’LL WALK AWAY WITH…
An in-depth understanding of your attachment patterns, how they show up in your life, and how to start creating more secure relationships with this knowledge.
A greater sense of confidence + trust in yourself, your intuition, and your decision making, along with go-to tools to make you feel more empowered and help you lean into feelings of high self-worth.
A proven framework for how to identify emotionally available partners + discern who is secure vs. insecure, and manage your own expectations around how they show up in your life.
Effective communication techniques to help you more quickly know who is worth investing your time + energy in, and that will help you get closer quicker when the person is a fit for you.
Hands-on experience using the dating apps to meet & identify emotionally available partners who are ready for the real deal.
A supportive community of like-minded people all going through similar journeys who can help you stay connected to your purpose and remind you of what you deserve!!
EARLY BIRD PRICING
Now until December 22nd
BONUS:
Sign up by Friday, December 17th and receive a free,
one-hour 1:1 love guidance session with Taryn!
10 spots available for January
FAQs
I’m so glad you asked!
QUESTION 1: Can I take the course at my own pace?
Yes! You will get this course and have it forever, so you can take it on your own time if that’s more convenient for you.
QUESTION 2: What if I can’t make the group coaching calls?
That’s no problem. The group coaching calls are an optional, added value to help you understand and integrate the material. They are here for you to use as you need them but are not required to get something out of the course.
QUESTION 3: How many people will be in my incubator?
This depends on how many people sign up, but no more than 10.
QUESTION 4: If you can't keep up with each week's module should you still join the coaching calls? If not, do you end up with another cohort when you do decide to join?
You can still join the coaching calls even if you’re not fully up to date on the material. The coaching calls are not lessons, but calls to offer support should people have questions or things they’re working through. Should you purchase the course and then want to put it on hold or do the work later, you can reach out and we can see about connecting you with another month’s calls, depending on availability.
QUESTION 5: Are using dating apps required for the course? Does someone need to be open to using the apps, or if they know the apps aren’t for them, is that ok?
No, you don’t need to be using the dating apps to learn this process of secure dating. You will still get a lot out of the course if you don’t sign up for them. However, you will learn how to use the apps should you change your mind, and they are a helpful tool in applying and integrating the material while getting support from Taryn and the other members of your incubator.
QUESTION 6: How much preparation is needed for the course? Any required background material?
No preparation is needed for the course, you will learn everything you need to know in the 4 weeks!
QUESTION 7: If I'm not ready to jump into dating just yet, but want to take a slower approach to building a healthy foundation for love (identifying and un-learning the core beliefs that are holding me back) is this course still for me?
Yes! This course will teach you how to build a healthy foundation for secure love that you can come back to review whenever you’re ready to jump in the dating pool. The main benefit of dating while taking the course is that it accelerates your results because you’re able to internalize the material as you learn it. But if you are taking a slower approach and simply want to learn the concepts and apply them at your own pace you will have the tools ready to go when the time comes!
QUESTION 8: Is there a payment plan for the course?
Yes, the option to pay in two installments is available upon request. Reach out to Taryn at hello@truerlove.com for details.
QUESTION 9: When does the course start?
The first week’s module drops on Sunday, January 2nd. We’ll host a short welcome ceremony that day and then group coaching will start on Saturday, January 8th, with following calls on the 15th, 22nd, and 29th.
THE SECURE LOVE INCUBATOR IS
PERFECT FOR YOU IF…
You feel confused or discouraged by dating.
You've dated a lot of emotionally unavailable or non-committal types.
You tend towards or have characteristics of an anxious or a fearful avoidant attachment style.
You don't know why you haven't met your person yet, and question if you ever will.
You feel like you don't connect romantically with people easily.
You feel like you self-sabotage your romantic relationships.
You're serious about finding an emotionally available partner who is ready for the real deal.
IF YOU ANSWERED YES TO ONE OR MORE OF THESE
YOU’RE READY TO JOIN
THE SECURE LOVE INCUBATOR
WHAT YOU’LL GET
Hands-on experience using the dating apps with a more secure mindset so that you can learn what it feels like to attract more available partners in real time.
4 online modules (dropping weekly) with comprehensive lessons taking you through the process of learning to date securely and attract more emotionally available partners.
Weekly exercises and guided journaling to help you integrate the material into your life and dating as you learn it.
4 optional group coaching calls via Zoom (held on Saturdays) with Taryn and the other members in your month’s incubator. These calls are optional but encouraged as they greatly increase your ability to understand, apply, and integrate the material, and therefore yield more effective results.
Online access to your incubator group on Mighty Networks, where you can post comments and questions about the course content or share any dating updates and receive support from those in your group.
Free access to the Truer Love Community Cohort, our membership made up of current and past clients who have been doing this work for some time and can provide great insight into the journey of learning to become a more secure dater.
1 (optional) group coaching call with the Truer Love Community Cohort.
Free access to all current and past specialty relationship + personal growth workshops taught by or with Truer Love. Some topics include astrology for attachment, coping with triggers, date night makeup, inner child meditation, self-care rituals, and more.
A 1-hour, complimentary 1:1 love guidance session with Taryn
(if registered by Friday, December 17th).
Curious about our community?
Find more out about the Truer Love Community Cohort HERE.
*FOR QUESTIONS ABOUT THIS OR ANY OTHER TRUER LOVE OFFERING,
PLEASE EMAIL TARYN AT HELLO@TRUERLOVE.COM